i started to think about the patterns freshmen have and how they act in their own groups compared to other grade(?) levels. over time, there's been many changes to the world and academia: freshmen want to strongly impress their newfound peers, pressures to adapt in an unknown environment, and getting used to independence. plainly, it's a lot. this is a list i did after having a conversation with a classmate of mine.
i started this list to reminisce my time in college. while i have varying ups and downs, i'm grateful for the experiences i've had, and the wild memories i have living in the city. it feels like a goodbye for right now, as there is not a 100% certainty on how my life post undergrad will look like. there will always be more things to do, but one step at a time. that's the grace i'll give myself.
note: this is a messy list. i started this list maybe last week and at this point i just want to release it. i'm going to keep thinking about more obvs.& advice, so i may update this post once in a while, but we'll see. also, this is coming from someone in their senior yr in an american college, so some advice will not apply to every single freshman reading this.
observations
they love to stick to big groups, if they vibe with them or not. i understand this bc every freshman's constant worry is living life without wasting it, or making FRIENDS till the end of the world. it's funny bc i don't think you see that much big junior/senior friend groups, but i could be wrong.
you can mostly spot them when they're wearing lanyards on their neck with their student ids, looking like scared nyc birds. they probably wear it so they don't have to take out their wallet every time they enter a dorm.
they talk too loud
no situational awareness. pls go to the side of the walkway if you're gonna talk to someone's ear on how your classes suck.
this could be to any level, but they love to dress up like they're on the runway. later, you can see them wearing wardrobes with less effort. it's funny to see the progression.
sometimes they like to appear like they know everything.
great deal of enthusiasm, almost jumping everywhere.
if you know a freshman personally, they ask you for everything (lovingly <3). if you need to know the hours for the library, pls look it up on their website. i appreciate you asking me as a resource, but let's take advantage of other resources that they give you during orientation mama.
advice
try to stay in campus, instead of home. you'll feel like the world consumes you: go on a walk to the nearest park. literally, sometimes you just have to go anywhere.
try to control fomo. trust me, there's a likely chance of a party/event every weekend. you are 18. the world doesn't end if you didn't go to that frat party.
sometimes you need to shut up. stay quiet and pay attention.
put the work and you'll see a result, maybe not the one you want, but at least you'll accomplish it.
go to your classes. fight the excuses and laziness off, go even if you think you're not going to do anything. you may learn something that'll change your day for the better or open your horizons.
when you can, eat outside your meal plan and go find new places to eat. when your friends or family want to eat something local/new, you'll know where to take them. those bad places you know can help other students and your friends.
close your eyes for 10 minutes every day. this helps screen fatigue
if you are tired when doing assignments, walk around the library or distract yourself with anything other than the assignment you are doing.
when you're finished with one assignment, try to move to another place so you have a new start or a different perspective when doing your homework.
to make acquaintances, start by talking to them. i say acquaintances, because you don't know if you'll want to be friends or not, but it doesn't hurt to put yourself out there. we are in college to socialize: do it. don't wait for anybody else to approach you because it's not gonna happen. everyone is literally in their own ass.
to add on, start by complimenting an aspect or the whole outfit. maybe ask where they got it. then, introduce yourself and let the conversation ride. if it helps, keep asking questions. once again: you are in college, you have to ask questions to anybody. be curious for fuck sake.
use your unexcused absences till the end of the semester, in case you need to study for another class or you're genuinely sick. trust me on this, you'll give yourself a pat in the back for it.
if you know what you want to do, try to find a fws (federal work study) job in that field. pay attention and give your best effort.
talk to your parents/and or guardians at least once a week. they'll miss you a ton, so bare with them. also, they still are getting used to the fact that you are an adult.
with parents, you need to start setting your ground. they will get mad, so have patience and compassion towards them. you're still a kid in their eyes.
go to office hours. you'll get extra help and some connection to your professor by showing up. they may do your recommendation letter...
make an effort to dress yourself for classes. i know i said people love to dress runway, but if it makes you feel better and gives you a reason to start your day? DO IT. NO ONE WILL CARE
in the first weeks, experiment going to different places on campus and see how you like them. does the 3rd floor help you most with productivity? does staying by the window seats in the coffee shop help you people watch? go places!
make plans to meet with newfound acquaintances. those plans aren't gonna show up out of nowhere.
don't say things that you don't believe: don't say things that you know in your heart are not true for you. don't stay stuff to please strangers and/or friends. don't say things to impress random people. you'll feel like your stomach has dropped, as well as you'll start people pleasing. it's tempting for the short run, but it'll cause great damage to your self in the long run.
don't date.
you'll probably don't have it, nor has it totally formed, but be confident and trust your gut. there will be a lot of people thinking they know you better than yourself, but you just met them. follow your instincts, rely on that voice inside you.
be open-minded. as you experience life day by day, you learn something new: you come across people you didn't think could exist, you get new perspectives, you are constantly facing an ever changing world. let yourself learn, and let it sink in.
check on your friends and parents/guardians. at least texting or calling once per week. they'll miss you as much as you miss them.